The "Real Housewife" Businesses, Ranked

Once you're invited to be a Real Housewife, it's like you're given an honorary business degree by some shady university. From vibrators to margaritas to toaster ovens, if there's a thing to be sold you know a Housewife is shilling it.

20. Kill All Cancer

Vicki Gunvalson's cancer "charity," chosen to help her rebound after the Brooks fake-cancer scandal, turned out to be a website that just forwarded people to Vicki's insurance sales. Once people realized, the "charity," aka business, quickly shuttered.

19. Tipsy Girl

Oh, Sonja. Poor Sonja. Sonja Morgan, Real Housewife of New York, has an appetite for business without the stomach for it. This has resulted in a few delightfully cringeworthy endeavors, none more so than Tipsy Girl. The prosecco, which was an obvious rip off of Skinny Girl, invoked the rage of Bethenny Frankel, which is never good. Needless to say, we won't be seeing Tipsy Girl on shelves any time soon.

18. Kim Zolciak’s Wigs

In Season Two of The Real Housewives of Atlanta Kim Zolciak decided to start a wig line. By the end of the season, she realized what everyone else already knew: Kim didn't want to sell wigs, she just wanted to buy herself a nicer one. R.I.P. Kim Zolciak's wigs (the business, she obviously still has dozens of personal wigs).

17. She by Sheree

She by Sheree is the fashion line that launched a thousand question marks. We first heard of it Season One of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, where much of the drama revolved around Sheree's launch of the line. Then, we got to see her fashion show… which didn't show any fashions (she opted to display sketches instead).

Last we heard of She by Sheree it was "still happening"— isn't it always? Sheree wore a dress by her eponymous line to WWHL in 2016. Other than that, we've seen nada.

16. Sonja Morgan’s Toaster Oven

Hunky guy or no hunky guy? That is the question. Who knew a shirtless man and a toaster oven could combine to ignite controversy? Sonja Morgan showed us it's possible as she complained all season that Heather Thompson did not provide adequate free labor for her photoshoot (she absolutely did.).

It seems that an old FIT professor finally got through to Sonja about the toaster, advising her that maybe a "toaster" wasn't the ideal brand strategy. We couldn't agree more, Professor Whoever-You-Are.

15. Wine by Wives

Remember when Vicki and Tamra were thick as thieves? Way back in the day they decided to start Wine by Wives. Conflict over who was doing more of the work— Vicki said she was, but…doesn't she always— put this project to a halt. If you're looking for some Housewife vino, you'll have to look elsewhere.

14. Sonja Morgan New York

When Sonja Morgan gets knocked down (with a toaster oven), she bounces back by launching a clothing line. Sonja opted to go with a line of boring dresses at exorbitant prices. We don't know who is buying these $1,000-dresses, but the website still seems to be operational.

13. blk. Water

Before Manzo'd with Children, Caroline Manzo was on Real Housewives of New Jersey, where we saw her sons start blk. Water. It's water that's naturally black because it's got minerals… or something.

It was a cool idea in theory, something that fit with the crunchy granola vibe, and Whole Foods picked it up. It seems people never took to drinking dirty-looking water, though, because Blk Water is difficult to get your hands on these days.

12. Diamonds by Vicki

Did you know Vicki Gunvalson started a diamond line? Honestly, neither did we. The line launched in 2015, with pieces ranging from $200-$5,000. The Amazon page for the line is still up, but there are no products listed. Insert a laughing emoji because we're dying.

11. Ramona Pinot Grigio

God bless Ramona Singer and her Pinot Grigio. Viewers of Real Housewives of New York know that Ramona loves her Pinot Grigio. It was something Ramona decided to capitalize on in Season Three of RHONY. In one memorable moment, Luann tries to trick Ramona into talking smack about her own wine, but Ramona instead compliments the wine. It was delicious enough to delight its creator, but sadly, this wine (like so many of the Housewife alcohol brands) has fallen by the wayside. Et tu, turtle time?

10. Gretchen Christine

By the time Gretchen left The Real Housewives of Orange County, she had been accused of faking pretty much everything in her life— her hair, her relationship with Slade, her business. Much of Gretchen's last season revolved around her business. What we didn't see? Customers. Her website is still up, though. There's a grand total of: 4 dresses/skirts, 1 pair of earrings, 2 bracelets, some weird picture frames, and a bunch of old makeup.

So, by Housewife standards, this business is still going kind of well.

9. Pop of Color

Pop of Color is a nail polish line by Kristen Taekman, of Real Housewives of New York. Bethenny Frankel, resident branding expert of the Housewives, gave the line a thumbs down because she said it was too close to nail polish line ColourPop. Still, something must have worked because you can still pick up your Pop of Color polish at Ricky's for only $8.

8. VANDERPUMP Beverly Hills

Lisa Vanderpump, the sometimes-queen of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, is best known for her restaurants, PUMP, Villa Blanca, and Sur, but LVP has her hand in many pots. She even has a home line based on her aesthetic. If you're looking for bejeweled ice buckets, the line is still available on Wayfair.

7. Envy

Melissa Gorga put on her entrepreneurial hat this past season to open Envy. After the season wrapped, the store temporarily closed. Gorga stated that the close was due to disagreements with her business partner, Jackie Beard Robinson, who is no longer involved in the store.

6. Consult Beauté

Terry and Heather Dubrow, or as they like to call themselves, Dr. and Mrs. Guinea Pig, launched a skincare line based on all their tests. They sold it on Evine, and the other Housewives called in. Apparently, so did other people because you can still purchase the line.

5. Cut Fitness

Tamra Judge is determined to get you into shape. With Eddie running many of the classes, or at least those that are filmed, this is a real family affair. We're not sure that Cut will make it long term, but for now it's here.

4. Kyle by Alene Too

Does Kyle Richards need to start a business? No, but like all women of means, she wanted to open a boutique. Thus, the world has been gifted with Kyle by Alene Too. The boutique has six locations now — Get it, Kyle! — so you have choices the next time you're looking for a leopard jumpsuit.

3. The Bailey Agency School of Fashion

When Atlanta Housewife Cynthia Bailey started The Bailey Agency, it seemed like a vanity project that wouldn't amount to anything. While other Housewife enterprises have come and gone, The Bailey Agency remains. With six-week classes priced at $1,000, we see that Cynthia must be raking in the dough.

2. Bedroom Kandi

Kandi Buress, Real Housewife of Atlanta, has either built a business empire or a pyramid scheme. Either way, her sex toy line, Bedroom Kandi, keeps expanding and hiring new consultants. If running "sex toy parties" sounds like a blast to you, you could become Kandi's newest consultant. If you do, please tell us if it's legit or not. We really don't know.

1. Skinnygirl

You knew it had to be Skinnygirl. Bethenny Frankel is a tour de force when it comes to branding. She's a veritable mogul at this point. Skinnygirl is sold just about everywhere (except Whole Foods) and it's now expanded into food as well.

Bethenny is killing it, and we don't see any Housewives eclipsing her business empire soon, but we're sure that many will try.